My life (in tweets)

I blog. A lot. And when I'm not blogging, I usually have my blackberry glued to my hands so I can tweet enough to give the folks at Verizon enough material for a new campaign based on Mom-tweeters (thereby giving the guy a run for his money.) And occasionally, some really good shhhtuff is deemed worthy enough by the Editor-in-Chief herself to be immortalized right here for the world to see (and Social Services to determine how many black marks I am away from having to explain my parenting.)

Here's tonight's reason to laugh your ass off:

@aspiringmama: If I'd known dinner was gonna be served 2 hours AFTER I got to the bday party, I'd have fed buttercup before leaving home. #hostessfail

@jeannevb: I'm so glad I only have to worry about teen sex now instead of toddler bday parties #perspective :)

@aspiringmama: that was an inspired moment. What are you on and can you share?

@jeannevb:  I am simply running on mother exhaustion and animal fumes...together at last.

And that folks, is why I almost snorted the contents of a juice box through my nose while trying not to lose it at tonight's little toddler shindig. After a few "What the hell is so funny?" looks from the hostess I was slamming on twitter (and you'll have to read my book when it's done to find out why I am actually the world's biggest asshole) I did the smart thing and put the blackberry away.

Friends don't let friends tweet about other friends in the presence of the friends being tweeted about. Stick it on a bumper and change the world.